The Infrequent Tales of a Dysfunctional Family

Monday, June 30, 2008

Age beats out youth again!

Yesterday when we went to church we parked a long, long way from the front door - as usual. Another Ward was in session, so the parking lot was pretty full and we were late - as usual.

When the services were over and we started back for the car, our 11-year old grandson made a big deal out of 'who was going to reach the car first'. He even dumped his sack of stuff on me so that he would have more freedom of movement to beat everybody else to the car.

I happened to take a different route, and Tim didn't consider me much of a threat anyway. He spent all his time taunting my husband and running just a little way ahead of him and then turning back to gloat. He didn't even notice me approaching the car from a different direction.

When I was just a few yards away, Tim suddenly noticed my position and with a howl of dismay came charging towards the car. Although I am not built for running (in any sense of the word!) I broke into a determined shuffle. Just before he reached the car, I swung his bag of stuff so that it touched the car, giving me the 'official' win. He was totally chagrined, and Bill just about fell all over himself he was laughing so hard.

This victory reminds me of the story of the two rival actresses, one getting on in years, and the other still young and sure of herself and her beauty. They both approached a doorway at the same time, and the younger one stepped back to allow the older one to go first, saying with a voice dripping in saccharine sympathy "Age before beauty". The older actress swept magnificently through the door, remarking in a well-bred voice "Pearls before swine".

Isn't victory sweet?

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Dynamo Day

Let's face it - I am basically a lazy person with a lot of good intentions. When I'm at work I make these long lists of all the things I need to do when I get home - and then when I actually GET home, I flop in front of the computer and play mindless games until I toddle off to bed. Every one in a while I will do a token item on my list just to appease my conscious.

This morning I came home more tired than usual. I had taken my older daughter to a doctor's appointment yesterday and it had lasted almost 4 hours - so I got to bed very, very late yesterday. Then somebody called in sick last night (at work), so I had to work extra hard to get everything done. Needless to say, as I walked into the house I wasn't feeling particularly motivated to do anything on my chore list.

But much to my surprise, this was one of my 'dynamo days'. I have them every once in a while, where I suddenly find myself doing all kinds of things that I am supposed to be doing. I sprang into action and this is what I accomplished.

Our huge commercial-sized freezer needed defrosting, which mean rearranging everything in the refrigerator freezers to make room for extra food. Fortunately we are right at the end of our six-month food cycle with Celebrity foods, so the freezer wasn't as full as usual. Still, it took considerable ingenuity to juggle everything around, and things that don't have to stay frozen (like cookies, flour, etc.) are out of the freezer for a while.

Bill has been bugging me to make some vegetables so he can heat them up for dinners, and with so little freezer space, it seemed a good time to use some of those frozen veggies. So I cooked up a big pot of baby lima beans, and a big pot of peas and carrots, and a big pot of green beans with onion and bacon.

I emptied the dishwasher (which is technically Timmy's job, but he rarely gets around to it), and refilled the dishwasher with the rest of the dishes - including the ones I had just used to cook all the vegetables in. We have a cleaning lady come in once every four weeks, and I don't like to waste her valuable (and expensive!) time on dishes. I'd rather she mopped out the defrosting freezer.

I am a visiting teaching supervisor, so I made the rest of the calls I had to do to finish off my report and then shipped it off (via email) to the head honcho.

In and around all of this, I fixed breakfast for Timmy and drove him to school; typed up the list for the cleaning lady and wrote out her check (I'm asleep when she comes and leaves); and read my younger daughter's blog (wonderful!), commented on it, and then was inspired to write a blog of my own for the day.

I think I'll go take a nap - a really long one.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Gluten-free Bread

When you take on the task of giving up everything made with wheat flour, one of the first things you miss is bread. After all, if you go to your local grocery store market and start reading the ingredients, you will find out that EVERY SINGLE ONE of their loaves of bread have gluten in them. In order to buy gluten-free bread you have to go to a health-food store.

There are several brands available, some refrigerated and some not. But they all have one thing in common - they taste like sawdust. Oh, it is recommended that you toast them first, but frankly, the only thing they're good for is crumbled up and used as bread crumbs in recipes that call for that.

I can't eat a lot of bread anyway (because of my lap-band) so this deprivation wasn't that hard on me, but it was really tough on Bill who loves sandwiches - and toast. He wasn't willing to give up our new gluten-free lifestyle for an occasional sandwich, but he was a bit bummed about it.

So yesterday (Monday being my cook-up-a-lot-of-gluten-free-things-for-us-to-eat-during-the-week day), I tried my hand at making a made-from-scratch loaf of gluten-free bread. And it was GREAT! Bill is absolutely ecstatic because he says that now he can have sandwiches again. I was particularly pleased because this particular recipe (although it uses yeast) doesn't require that tedious kneading procedure to get the proper texture for the bread.

I thought perhaps I would share the recipe with you, as this is actually a very tasty bread - in fact it is called light graham bread. It requires 1 1/3 cups of the 'featherlight' flour mix which is as follow:
1 part white rice flour
1 part tapioca flour
1 part cornstarch
1 tsp. per cup of potato flour
Actually they recommend making a bunch of this mix up ahead of time as it is used in a lot of recipes, and its actually 3 cups each of the first three flours, and 3 tablespoons of the potato flour (NOT potato starch - it's easy to get them confused)

So on to the actual recipe:
DRY INGREDIENTS
3/4 cup dark teff flour
1 1/3 cups Featherlight Mix
1 1/2 tsp. Xanthan gum
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp. dry unflavored gelatin
1 tsp. egg replacer (dry)
2 TB brown sugar
WET INGREDIENTS
1 cup lukewarm water (more or less)
pinch of sugar
1 TB yeast
1 egg plus 1 egg white
1 tsp. vinegar
3 TB vegetable oil
2 TB honey

Grease a 8 1/2" x 4 1/2" loaf pan.
In a medium bowl, whisk together the dry ingredients.
To the cup of lukewarm water, add a pinch of sugar and the yeast. Set aside to proof until the foam is approximately 1/2" (don't use a 1 cup measuring cup or it will overflow!)
In the bowl of the mixer, break the eggs; add the vinegar, oil and honey. Blend on low. Add the yeast-water and blend. Slowly spoon in the dry ingredients. If the dought doesn't fall from the paddle in a thick waterfall, add more lukewarm water by the tablespoon until the dough has the right consistency (like thick cake batter). Beat 3 1/2 minutes on high.
Spoon into the prepared pan, cover and let rise for about 35 minutes for quick-rising yeast and 1 hour for regular. Bake at 400 for 1 hour, covering with aluminum foil after the first 10 minutes to avoid scorching. Removed from the pan immediately. Cool before slicing. (Well - I didn't - I had a nice hot slice slathered in butter, and it was good).
Nutrients per slice: Calories 110, Fat 3 gm, Cholesterol 15 mg
Sodium 80 mg, Carbohydrates; 19 gm, Protein 2gm, Fiber 1 gm
You can vary it by adding a couple of tablespoons of sesame seed to make sesame graham bread, or 3 tablespoons of almond meal to the dry ingredients, and 2 tablespooons of chopped nuts right before spooning it into the pan to make Nutty Graham bread.
I'm not going to bother giving you the recipe for oatmeal raisin cookies (actually quinoa raisin cookies) because they turned out weird. They taste OK (although not exceptional), but they are definitely weird.