The Infrequent Tales of a Dysfunctional Family

Monday, June 30, 2008

Age beats out youth again!

Yesterday when we went to church we parked a long, long way from the front door - as usual. Another Ward was in session, so the parking lot was pretty full and we were late - as usual.

When the services were over and we started back for the car, our 11-year old grandson made a big deal out of 'who was going to reach the car first'. He even dumped his sack of stuff on me so that he would have more freedom of movement to beat everybody else to the car.

I happened to take a different route, and Tim didn't consider me much of a threat anyway. He spent all his time taunting my husband and running just a little way ahead of him and then turning back to gloat. He didn't even notice me approaching the car from a different direction.

When I was just a few yards away, Tim suddenly noticed my position and with a howl of dismay came charging towards the car. Although I am not built for running (in any sense of the word!) I broke into a determined shuffle. Just before he reached the car, I swung his bag of stuff so that it touched the car, giving me the 'official' win. He was totally chagrined, and Bill just about fell all over himself he was laughing so hard.

This victory reminds me of the story of the two rival actresses, one getting on in years, and the other still young and sure of herself and her beauty. They both approached a doorway at the same time, and the younger one stepped back to allow the older one to go first, saying with a voice dripping in saccharine sympathy "Age before beauty". The older actress swept magnificently through the door, remarking in a well-bred voice "Pearls before swine".

Isn't victory sweet?

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Dynamo Day

Let's face it - I am basically a lazy person with a lot of good intentions. When I'm at work I make these long lists of all the things I need to do when I get home - and then when I actually GET home, I flop in front of the computer and play mindless games until I toddle off to bed. Every one in a while I will do a token item on my list just to appease my conscious.

This morning I came home more tired than usual. I had taken my older daughter to a doctor's appointment yesterday and it had lasted almost 4 hours - so I got to bed very, very late yesterday. Then somebody called in sick last night (at work), so I had to work extra hard to get everything done. Needless to say, as I walked into the house I wasn't feeling particularly motivated to do anything on my chore list.

But much to my surprise, this was one of my 'dynamo days'. I have them every once in a while, where I suddenly find myself doing all kinds of things that I am supposed to be doing. I sprang into action and this is what I accomplished.

Our huge commercial-sized freezer needed defrosting, which mean rearranging everything in the refrigerator freezers to make room for extra food. Fortunately we are right at the end of our six-month food cycle with Celebrity foods, so the freezer wasn't as full as usual. Still, it took considerable ingenuity to juggle everything around, and things that don't have to stay frozen (like cookies, flour, etc.) are out of the freezer for a while.

Bill has been bugging me to make some vegetables so he can heat them up for dinners, and with so little freezer space, it seemed a good time to use some of those frozen veggies. So I cooked up a big pot of baby lima beans, and a big pot of peas and carrots, and a big pot of green beans with onion and bacon.

I emptied the dishwasher (which is technically Timmy's job, but he rarely gets around to it), and refilled the dishwasher with the rest of the dishes - including the ones I had just used to cook all the vegetables in. We have a cleaning lady come in once every four weeks, and I don't like to waste her valuable (and expensive!) time on dishes. I'd rather she mopped out the defrosting freezer.

I am a visiting teaching supervisor, so I made the rest of the calls I had to do to finish off my report and then shipped it off (via email) to the head honcho.

In and around all of this, I fixed breakfast for Timmy and drove him to school; typed up the list for the cleaning lady and wrote out her check (I'm asleep when she comes and leaves); and read my younger daughter's blog (wonderful!), commented on it, and then was inspired to write a blog of my own for the day.

I think I'll go take a nap - a really long one.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Gluten-free Bread

When you take on the task of giving up everything made with wheat flour, one of the first things you miss is bread. After all, if you go to your local grocery store market and start reading the ingredients, you will find out that EVERY SINGLE ONE of their loaves of bread have gluten in them. In order to buy gluten-free bread you have to go to a health-food store.

There are several brands available, some refrigerated and some not. But they all have one thing in common - they taste like sawdust. Oh, it is recommended that you toast them first, but frankly, the only thing they're good for is crumbled up and used as bread crumbs in recipes that call for that.

I can't eat a lot of bread anyway (because of my lap-band) so this deprivation wasn't that hard on me, but it was really tough on Bill who loves sandwiches - and toast. He wasn't willing to give up our new gluten-free lifestyle for an occasional sandwich, but he was a bit bummed about it.

So yesterday (Monday being my cook-up-a-lot-of-gluten-free-things-for-us-to-eat-during-the-week day), I tried my hand at making a made-from-scratch loaf of gluten-free bread. And it was GREAT! Bill is absolutely ecstatic because he says that now he can have sandwiches again. I was particularly pleased because this particular recipe (although it uses yeast) doesn't require that tedious kneading procedure to get the proper texture for the bread.

I thought perhaps I would share the recipe with you, as this is actually a very tasty bread - in fact it is called light graham bread. It requires 1 1/3 cups of the 'featherlight' flour mix which is as follow:
1 part white rice flour
1 part tapioca flour
1 part cornstarch
1 tsp. per cup of potato flour
Actually they recommend making a bunch of this mix up ahead of time as it is used in a lot of recipes, and its actually 3 cups each of the first three flours, and 3 tablespoons of the potato flour (NOT potato starch - it's easy to get them confused)

So on to the actual recipe:
DRY INGREDIENTS
3/4 cup dark teff flour
1 1/3 cups Featherlight Mix
1 1/2 tsp. Xanthan gum
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp. dry unflavored gelatin
1 tsp. egg replacer (dry)
2 TB brown sugar
WET INGREDIENTS
1 cup lukewarm water (more or less)
pinch of sugar
1 TB yeast
1 egg plus 1 egg white
1 tsp. vinegar
3 TB vegetable oil
2 TB honey

Grease a 8 1/2" x 4 1/2" loaf pan.
In a medium bowl, whisk together the dry ingredients.
To the cup of lukewarm water, add a pinch of sugar and the yeast. Set aside to proof until the foam is approximately 1/2" (don't use a 1 cup measuring cup or it will overflow!)
In the bowl of the mixer, break the eggs; add the vinegar, oil and honey. Blend on low. Add the yeast-water and blend. Slowly spoon in the dry ingredients. If the dought doesn't fall from the paddle in a thick waterfall, add more lukewarm water by the tablespoon until the dough has the right consistency (like thick cake batter). Beat 3 1/2 minutes on high.
Spoon into the prepared pan, cover and let rise for about 35 minutes for quick-rising yeast and 1 hour for regular. Bake at 400 for 1 hour, covering with aluminum foil after the first 10 minutes to avoid scorching. Removed from the pan immediately. Cool before slicing. (Well - I didn't - I had a nice hot slice slathered in butter, and it was good).
Nutrients per slice: Calories 110, Fat 3 gm, Cholesterol 15 mg
Sodium 80 mg, Carbohydrates; 19 gm, Protein 2gm, Fiber 1 gm
You can vary it by adding a couple of tablespoons of sesame seed to make sesame graham bread, or 3 tablespoons of almond meal to the dry ingredients, and 2 tablespooons of chopped nuts right before spooning it into the pan to make Nutty Graham bread.
I'm not going to bother giving you the recipe for oatmeal raisin cookies (actually quinoa raisin cookies) because they turned out weird. They taste OK (although not exceptional), but they are definitely weird.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Three Weeks now

For the ONE person who is actually reading my blogs (and persuaded me to start doing this), here is an update on our gluten-free lifestyle. It is now three weeks since we started abstaining from wheat, barley and rye, and I think it has been positive. Bill says he feels better, and is having a lot less flatulence (and less stinky). I have lost some weight, although I have to admit that I am not 100% sure that is because of being gluten-free. I have to give a lot of credit to the lap-band because I am certainly limited on how much I can eat at a time!

I have made several gluten-free dishes that we have both liked, although Tim hasn't cared for them much - except for the Hawaiian Dream Drop Cookies! He didn't care for the Banana-Pineapple cake, although Bill and I both like it. So far the dishes I have made include Tamale Pie, Chicken with Noodles (gluten-free of course), Fruited Rice with Chicken, and Tuna Casserole. I have also made of couple of our traditional dishes that I knew didn't have gluten in them - Chicken Stew and Lima Beans with Ham Hocks.

We have also purchased several things from the health-food store that are gluten-free. I particularly liked the ranch-flavored crackers, and Bill has fallen in love with the shortbread cookies. I finally found a teriyaki marinade that is gluten-free (most of them have soy sauce in them and that contains wheat) and I have found a line of bars that are gluten-free and pretty tasty - Larabars. I particularly like their cherry pie and cinnamon roll flavors.

However, I have to remind myself that gluten-free is not necessarily low-calorie. When I was in San Diego I made a pig of myself with the two boxes of See's candy that my cousin provided - as I had gone on-line to find out that See's is gluten-free (at least their prepackaged boxes of candy). I have also given up (temporarily) on going lactose-free as well as gluten-free. I find dealing with one deletion from our diet is enough to handle right now - but I have it hovering in the back of my mind that I may have to give up chocolate in the long run.

Gluten-free is also not a cheap way to eat - at least at the start. All the specialty flours get expensive, although they last for a while. Funny - I haven't really missed bread at all. We bought some gluten-free brands but I don't care much for them. Of course, with the lap-band I wasn't eating much bread before either.

Oops - running out of time. I'll post again later - just for YOU, daughter dear.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Daughters and Sons

One of my all-time favorite books is 'Seven daughters and seven sons' by Barbara Cohen and Bahija Lovejoy. It is based on a folktale from Iraq that has been around since the 11th century. As in many countries, having sons is considered a blessing, while having daughters is considered a curse. One brother is 'blessed' with seven sons and considerable wealth, while the other brother is 'cursed' with seven daughters and poverty. The story tells how one of the daughters turns the tables on her uncle and cousins.

However, despite the fact that we live in an 'enlightened' time, there is still a bit of the 'sons are better than daughters' philosophy floating around, especially in certain countries. In China, for example, where there is quite a push for couples to only have one child, a male child is much more preferable to a female child, because sons have to support their parents when they grow up - and daughters don't.

If you have ever seen the mini-series 'Thorn Birds', you will hear the mother state that a mother only takes pride in her sons, and not in her daughters. An Irish professor once told me that in old Ireland the sons were treated like kings by their mothers. And from personal experience, it almost seems to be a 'given' that every man wants to have a son.

So - when I tell people that my younger daughter is expected her FOURTH girl, I tend to get sympathy from people. They express the opinion that my son-in-law must be disappointed, if not my daughter. And I am here to tell you that this sympathy is wasted on them, because they are both THRILLED to be having another daughter.

Little girls are a lot of fun - as I know for a fact since we had two daughters ourself. I was recently at a conference where an entertainer mentioned that he has three daughters and he is 'crazy in love' with them. He didn't appear to be the least upset not to have a son.

Don't get me wrong here - my daughter and son-in-law would probably be equally thrilled to have a boy. Whatever the Lord sends them, that's what they want. Every child of theirs will get just as much love whether they are male or female. Just don't go giving them any sympathy because they have a family of females because they don't need it. Besides, you have to be careful what you wish for. As I said before, we had two daughters and no sons - and now we're raising our grandson!

Monday, May 5, 2008

This is harder than I thought!

I have discovered that going gluten-free isn't for wimps. AND, it really needs to be planned out ahead of time. I thought we had, but now that we have been on this new lifestyle for about 5 days, I find myself woefully unprepared.

Just about every day finds me over at Marlene's Health Food store looking for another gluten-free item. Bill is living on almond-butter sandwiches (on non-gluten bread of course), and we are all getting sick of the chicken stew that I made up on day one. Obviously I made a LOT of it, because it is still going strong.

I finally got the cookbook in the mail that I had been waiting for, so today I thought I would actually try out one of the recipes. I needed to make up the various 'mixes' that are used in the recipes, so I went down to Marlene's (AGAIN!) and bought tapioca flour, white rice flour, potato flour, potato starch, soup bases, etc. I also went to Wal-Mart to get some canisters to put these mixes in.

Guess I should have done my homework a little better. I only picked up 4 cups of white rice flour, and it is needed (in large quantities) in just about every mixture. So I made up a small batch of the 'featherlight mix', and the 'gluten-free mix', and ran out of rice flour before I could make up the soup base mix - which I needed for the recipe I was going to make today. Blat! Fortunately I hadn't started boiling the gluten-free noodles yet. (Can you believe it? - this recipe book suggest you make your own noodles! Wow!)

Tomorrow I have to spend my morning taking my older daughter to a doctor's appointment in Seattle, but I imagine once I get her back home again, I will be heading over to Marlene's to get MORE rice flour.

I ought to mention that you have to be a bit careful when dumping these flours together as they puff up quite a bit. In fact, part of my kitchen look like a powdered donut. I really should clean it all up and do the dishes, but I worked last night, and it's getting late, and I'm working tonight . . . so I think I'll just let the boys wonder what happened when they get home and see the snowfall! Hope Bill enjoys his almond-butter sandwich tonight.

Friday, May 2, 2008

Harry Potter wannabe?

Sometimes when something is extremely popular (and there is no denying that Harry Potter is VERY popular), other things come along that seem a bit similar. Not that this is a bad thing, mind you. After all, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Well, I recently finished reading 'The Lightning Thief' by Rick Riordan. I enjoyed it enormously - enough to buy the other books in the series. However, when I got to thinking about it, there are a LOT of parallels with the Harry Potter world.

The protaganist, Percy Jackson(Harry Potter?) finds out that he belongs to a special group of people that live unbeknownst to the rest of us. He is a demigod - or half-god, half-human (Harry Potter is a wizard). Even among this special class, he stands out as being a bit extra special. Sound familiar?

He has to go to a special school for demigods - Camp Halfblood (Hogwarts?), where there is a kindly mentor to help him out - Chiron (Dumbledore?) There is also a person in authority who doesn't like him at all - Dionysis (Snape?).

At this camp, people are divided into different houses, depending on their sire. Percy is in Poseidon's house (Gryffindor?), and his best friend is a bit of a doofus - Grover (Ron?). He gets most of his help from an extremely intelligent girl - Annabeth (Hermione?) who knows everything about everything.

Through no fault of his own, poor Percy is thrown headlong into adventure after adventure, just because of who he is, and the main evil guy - Kronos (Voldemort?) is out to get HIM. But Kronos has been defeated before, and is trying to make a comeback using other people - like Luke (Professor Quimbly?)

Well, enough said. Please don't get the wrong impression - I have always loved Greek mythology, and I really enjoy how it is integrated into the 'Percy & the Olympians' series. But the next time you read one of these books, just see if my observations have some merit.